Chasing Summer

As you can see here, I’m not giving into fall pinings just yet! While I may or may not have bought some autumnal clothing recently, those daydreams of tights and booties just aren’t cutting it for the continual 90 degree weather in New England. That’s ok, I’m soaking up every ounce of the summer heat while I can!

I bought these fabulously bright jeans from a local shoppe recently. I was walking past to grab a coffee when I saw that they were on the $20 sale rack. I loved the color, so I figured I’d stop and look at the size at least. Well, they were (roughly) my size, so I thought, “hell, let me try them on then!” Tried them and they fit perfectly — minus the eight inches of additional leg length! But I eyed the original price tag: $128! No way could I pass up awesomely bright jeans that were marked down $108; even after getting them hemmed, I still saved $100 off the original tag!

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Blouse: Old Navy (old)

Tank: Old Navy (old)

Pants: Yoga Jeans by Second Clothing at a local shoppe

Shoes: Toms

Like the jeans story, sometimes the world works in other ways exactly when need it.

On Friday night, B and I went to a gong bath, which is an alternative healing music therapy session. A gong master plays finely crafted gongs for a group of people with the intention that the music and resonance will penetrate your core and — essentially — shake away the bad stuff. We’ve done them a few times and, I’ll say, I always feel great afterward: I sleep deeply and peacefully; my body feels looser; I end up with a better outlook. They’re simply restorative sessions.

What really struck me was the narrative given by the two leaders afterward. One instructed the room that over the next few days, don’t be surprised if the world turns up messages for you in unexpected ways. And the other said, plainly, “You’re all adults: you’re responsible for yourselves, and that included your own happiness. Everyday you’re given the option to be the person you want to be — so do it.” And, well, that’s what the world told me in such large, varied ways.

B and I saw a stunning theatrical rendition of Jane Eyre Saturday night: a woman who goes against social norms and adversity, ultimately finding strength and confidence to be herself, as well finding herself on equal footing with her partner. As an almost-30-year-old, that story line rang pretty true.

Then I attended a long training session for the theatre on customer service skill development. In the crazy way the world works, the session touched upon (at least in how I read it): work/life balance; personal trigger warnings of stress and distress; honoring others’ dignities; reading and communicating with stressed/distressed people effectively; and visualizing your own personal and professional success. Phew!

Finally, I received an email about a meditation seminar happening in October: a two day event for those who have little or no experience with meditation on how to start a practice and use it effectively. I signed up within a day of seeing it!

I know that I complained about some really hard days lately, but I guess the larger universe heard that and answered pretty significantly. I can’t say every problem has been answered, but I’m certainly learning to come at a lot of those dilemmas from a different angle instead.

My Intent: “Challenge” Accepted!

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A month or so ago, while reading about Joules’ experience at the BlogHer conference this year, I noticed a fun, customized bracelet she acquired: a simple metal ring with “joules” on it, tied on with a light cord. I just found it so intriguing that she had it made for her there that I had to track it down.

Turns out, the maker of the bracelet, My Intent, is yet another cool organization — like TOMS or Out of Print — that is in existence for more beyond consumers simply buying products. While there is not pay-it-forward quality to My Intent, their aim and goal is to create dialog: everyone has a word or phrase that synopsizes a story, mindset or intention for them. What would happen if you wore that word, almost like your heart on your sleeve? What if everyone could see this engaging, yet subtle, piece and ask you about it? You talk, you share, you connect. And I loved that idea instantly and couldn’t resist.

Within a day of reading through the My Intent site — looking at pictures, reading stories — I had to buy a piece. After thinking long and hard, I decided to opt for “challenge.”

I’m naturally a super quiet, shy person. I can certainly be open and giving in specific circumstances, like at work, but I naturally safeguard myself extensively personally, to the point sometimes of near debilitation. This piece is a reminder to myself to accept challenge in life — to put myself forward, even if it scares the hell of out of me; to take risks, despite that being against my nature; or, simply, to voice my thoughts and opinions to those who oppose, literally to challenge others. This is daily reinforcement to step up and out of my comfort zone, knowing it’ll be scary and wonderful all at once.

PSA: Wear Sunscreen.

Yesterday, I spent the day with a friend walking around a touristy vacation spot. We got lost and walked for a few hours in the blaring sunlight. I’m now bright red.

When I got home, I thought about this song: how much I loved it at 13-14 years old, and how much wisdom I remembered was packed in this. I just watched it and, well, it didn’t hit me then as much as it does now. As I mentioned in my last post, over the next few months, before I turn 30, I’m planning on addressing some major life problems/goals/dreams that I’d like to change or aspire to. Let’s casually say that this video is a preface to all of those endeavors.

I’ll see you when I’m less lobster-red, folks.

Balancing Act

IMG_2563IMG_2534Dress: Old Navy

Cardigan: Loft

Belt: Target

Shoes: TOMS

Earrings: Old Navy

I was rereading some old posts and noticed how often I mention that my work days are hard or tough or trying in some way. There are few people in the world who can say that their occupations are stressless, worry-free, ideal. While I’m not one obviously, I also don’t want to imply that my professional life is somehow abysmal: in my full-time gig, I’m lucky to work in my favorite little city, learning its ins and outs, and talking to people everyday about it; in my side job, I engage with people at a theatre — a place where they are actively partaking in hours of social make-believe. Considering I’m not-yet-30, I would say those are pretty sweet deals.

That said, here’s the rehearsed line: “yesterday was a hard day.” We had a huge work event in the high heat of August. There were unclear expectations, a lot of problems to resolve on the spot, and some unkind actions. I came home — hot, sticky, tired, achy — took a bath, drank a glass of wine and cried. It was one of the hardest work days I’ve ever experienced.

As I’m about to turn 30, I’ve been thinking of the changes my life should take. (In some weird, macabre way, when I was a child, I never thought I would live to 20, let alone 30, imagining I would die young, tragically, romantically. Too much Poe and Shakespeare for me, I suppose.) I’ve considered the professional, the financial, the familial, the physical; yesterday’s event, though, veered me to the hardest needs and wants, goals and dreams to consider — the emotional, the personal, the intellectual. “What type of person do I want to be?” “What lessons have gone unlearned thusfar?” “How will I be remembered when I’m gone?”

I have an unhealthy work-life balance, as in, there is no balance. I work a lot — for ten months a year, I average 50-60 hour work weeks — and I let everything else slide. Friendships have withered, my exercise routine is null, and I’m left tired and dull feeling so often. That’s not who I want to be, nor is that how I want others to think or remember me, the workhorse with no life. Yesterday truly made me think: is this it? Is this all I have to hold on to — this beat, extinguished feeling? I reflected back to this window when I was 25 when life was perfect: I worked a full-time and a part-time job; ran several times a week; took poetry writing classes; organized a high school reunion with old friends; and courted B by walking around the city. There was hope and happy exhaustion. And that’s want I want again.

While this is mainly a fashion blog, over the next few months, I’me endeavoring to share my “30th birthday resolutions:” the aspirations I’m hoping to incorporate as I close one chapter to open another.

Vampin’ It

You know when you’ve hit that point when you’re so tired and so stressed that it comes out in fits of giggles? Yeah, that’s this week. (I’d much rather have that than an explosion of anger or tears!)

Today was (yet-another) a long haul day: running around in prepping for an event Saturday, a private group tour of the museum, and then manning the museum for an after hours thing that takes place outside the building. This dress, though, is my go-to for such days. I slip it on like a jacket, zip it up, DONE. And it looks classy. It’s so easy to wear, I was — literally –showing a coworker how to do downward dog in it. (I made sure to put my butt toward the wall because, despite being magically wonderful, this dress is still too short for yoga. You pick your battles when dress shopping.)

I upped the ante with some vampy red lipstick. While not autumn just yet, I couldn’t resist the nod in its direction. I’m trying so desperately to savor the last bits of summer, but I can’t help looking to the fall: tweed jackets, scarves, boots, and all.

I felt very 1940’s starlet with the lipstick and “fancy dress” (as a volunteer called it) that I tried to channel that in some of these photos. That obviously devolved quickly into goofiness, including the quintessential “lemon face”/”lion face.”  B, who is still recuperating from surgery last week, laughed at the inanity of this mini-shoot. While there are some photos here, I declined posting those in which I: shook my butt dancing; nearly fell over; made overly animated face and hand gestures while on a phone call. You don’t need to see that, I promise.

Considering I’m still a day away from this big event, I’m really curious about how the punchiness will manifest in the near future!

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Dress: H&M

Shoes: TOMS

Necklace: LOFT

Watch: Fossil